Tuesday, April 28, 2009

History of ACs - The Bathroom Incident

This is a blog about Baby C, but from time to time, I think it would be fun to share stories about Allison and I. I thought the blog would be a fun thing to do while waiting for Baby C to arrive, but after several suggestions to turn it into a book for Baby C or at least let him read this when he is old enough I thought he should hear some old stories stories about his parents too. Hope you enjoy them.

Let me start by saying I don't embarrass easily. However on this fateful Sunday, I was 10 times more embarrassed than I'd ever been in my life. This is the bathroom incident.

Almost a month into our relationship Allison took me to Maureen's Kitchen for the first time. Maureen's Kitchen is a breakfast & lunch place only located in Smithtown, NY. I had never gone before because it's normal to have a 45-90 minute wait on the weekend. Personally, give me McDonalds Hotcakes & Sausage with a hash brown and I'm good. 6 minutes, done. The things you do for love!

Anyway, we had about a 30 minute wait. We had a table on the porch in view of Allison's Aunt & Uncle who also happened to be there for breakfast. It was great. Pancakes were fluffy, bacon was crispy. Wonderful place.

For those of you who don't really know me, now is a good time to tell you about my stomach issue. My stomach produces too much acid and at times...I'll put it as delicate as possible...my stomach calls for emergeny evacuation through the basement, not the attic!??!  I think you guys know what I'm talking about.

So, we were off for a full day of shopping (again, the things you do for love & early in a relationship) when my stomach started to gurgle. I asked Allison to stop by her apartment so I could use the bathroom.

Back at her place, I did my business and flushed. I noticed there was a slight clog. The water was very close to the top about to overflow and it stopped. I mean it was right at the rim. So I started to panic. I really didn't think I just reacted.

I thought to myself "Hey, the water isn't going down. maybe I'll just flush again. Yeah, that will do the trick." Well not exactly. as soon as I flushed, the water started overflowing. Now I had already decided I loved Allison and had to be with her for the rest of my life. So here I am in the bathroom watching my future spill over the side of the bowl freaking out.

There was a lot of water and instead of killing the water supply, I decided to do damage control. I took her towels and bathmat and made a dam to keep all of the toilet water in one central area. Once I did that, I headed under the sink for some paper towels and other cleaning supplies.

I was so freaked out, that i didn't think to pull up my shorts. So now here I am, cleaning up a floor full of dirty water, that my shorts are now splashing around in, about to lose the girl of my dreams and I am out of dry towels. So I pull up my shorts, poke my head out the door and say "Don't come in here...but do you have some towels or perhaps a mop??"

At hearing this Allison just started cracking up. And comes in to help me. She shooshed me out after most of the mess was cleaned to finish cleaning up the mess. (for real...the things you do for love) I was just sitting on the couch in shock. This happens in Along Came Polly, this doesn't happen in real life. I assure you, it does.

So she comes out and is laughing and shaking her head. I am still sitting there in shock, not looking at her, not talking and not moving. I then say, "Well, let's get a new pair of shorts for me and some new towels and a bath mat for you"

It wasn't until we were in the car on our way to the store that I was able to talk about it. I called my friend Tim and started telling him the story. He hung up on me becsue I was laughing so hard that I was crying and no sound was coming out. Allison was doing the same, and we had to pull the car over to compose ourselves. Disaster averted.

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