Monday, November 30, 2009

November 30th, 25 Days til Christmas

It's November 30th. The last day of November, the last day of hurricane season and the last day before my Christmas spirit kicks in. Well, that's if things follow as they have in years past. Since Ben has been born, I've changed so much, I have no idea how I'll react.

We put up the tree and decorated the house this weekend. I had fun doing the tree and the inside of the house, but I had no interest or desire to do the lights outside. Even walking around on the roof didn't make it fun for me. It's crazy because last year I was so excited about it. What's changed since last year?

Another change I've noticed is that I no longer have patience for Molly's shenanigans. She was mad about being left alone at my in-laws house for Thanksgiving and has been pooping in the house every day since. In the past I would be ok with it. I'd say "It's ok, she's still mad at us." But now, I'm over it. The 2nd time she pooped I asked Allison if we could sell her or donate her to the Ronald McDonald house. She's still a good girl and I'll never get rid of her, but ever since Ben arrived, she's definately dropped way down on my list. If I was to make a list of my favorite's in my house, It would go something like this. 1) Ben & Allison (a tie for first) 2) Ben 3) Allison 4, 5, 6) Ben 7) Molly. She's dropped from 2nd to 7th. That hurts. Good thing she can't read.

Anyway, back to a more cheeeful subject. Christmas! Over the next few weeks, I'll list out my favorite Christmas movies, cartoons, Christmas moments and Christmas songs.Here is a list of my favorite Christmas songs.

  • The Happiest Christmas Tree - Nat King Cole. I first head it when I was 18 and working at Kids R Us. It's awesome. It's sung by the tree.
  • Baby Please Come Home - U2 - How often do you get to rock out to Christmas Carols?
  • Christmas in Hollis - Run DMC - How often can you rap along with christmas Carols?
  • I Wish it was Christmas Today - SNL - Something about Tracy Morgan that is hilarious in this video.
  • Home for the Holidays - The Carpenters - Another R Us classic. Can't you just see me dancing around the store like an idiot to this one? Sorry about the first 30 seconds of the video.

  • Merry F**king Christmas - Mr. Garrison - VERY OFFENSIVE...NOT SAFE FOR LITTLE EARS, but hillarious. I can't show the video here...but it you want to hear it...click the link. Mr Garrison - Merry F**king Christmas
  • The Christmas Shoes - Newsong - A touching song. It almost makes me cry every Christmas.

  • It Must Have Been Ol Santa Claus - Harry Connick Jr - Another R Us favorite that was drilled into my head during my retail days.
  • Happy Christmas - John Lennon - This is just a great song. If you disagree with me, I will fight you.

  • Dominick The Donkey - Lou Monte - Great song. I found a really awesome video for it.


Ok, I could go on all day doing this. Here is the last one for today...
  • All I Want for Christmas is You - Mariah Carey - Great song, I've never seen the video before, it's not bad.



This is why you have to buy the DVD. It's not as funny on TBS without full scenes like this.


OK OK...NOW I'm done. Stay tuned for more Christmas posts.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Thanksgiving 2009

It's been a while since I posted anything. I'm having a hard time getting my schedule in order. When I get home from work I have at most 2 hours with Benjamin before he goes to sleep, usually less. If I go running, I only have 20 minutes with him. He is usually in bed when I get back from my run. I would like to post more, but I'd much rather spend that time with Ben while he's awake. Once he goes to bed, I have to get done all the things I wasn't doing while I was hanging out with him. Which is leaving me with very little time to write.

This week Benjamin started paying attention to things. He's always looked around and seemed curious about things, but now he is now reaching out for the toys on his bouncer and holding his soft farm animal book in his hands. He smiles at me after 30-45 seconds when I get home from work and will follow our faces and his toys from side to side. He also has responded really well to the nickname Capt. Handsome.

Since it's Thanksgiving, it's a good time to post a list of things I'm most thankful for.
  • I'm thankful for Allison and Benjamin for more than I can list here.
  • I'm thankful to Erica the delivery nurse and Dr Thatcher for the excellent job they did during Ben's delivery.
  • I'm thankful to Dr. Snow and his staff for their help while Allison was pregnant.
  • I'm thankful for my family and friends.
  • I'm thankful for the new friends I've made in FL who have quickly become family to me.
  • I'm thankful that I have a job.
  • I'm thankful for my house
  • I'm thankful for the holiday season & Allison's baking
There's a lot more that I'm thankful for, but I don't want to bore you. There will be more posts soon.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

From Die-Hard fan to Ho-hum fan

I heard a joke about 5 years ago. I don't remember exactly how it went, but it was about an upset boyfriend and his girlfriend trying to figure out what was wrong. She asked if she needed to clean more, cook better, spice things up in the bedroom. The boyfriend said no, all that stuff is fine. The girlfriend asked, "then what's wrong? Why have you been so down & upset with me today?" The boyfriend replies "The Yankees lost"

It's funny cause it's true. When your team loses, depending on the importance of the game and the way they lost, it will upset you for hours or days. I'm sorry to say being a Jets, Mets, Devils & Magic fan, I know more than I wish to know about my teams losing.

Before Benjamin was born I would get so upset when my team lost. I would mope or be in a bad mood for days. Now...eh. It sucks that they lost, but I have more important things going on. Having said that, there are some grudges I have, that I will probably never let go of.

  • I will still 'Boo' Cliff Floyd and Carlos Beltran both for striking out looking to end game 7 of the 2006 NLCS. (More Floyd than Beltran, try something man. Arguing with the ump after you strike out looking does not cut it)
  • I would not help Stéphane Matteau out of a ditch.
  • Timo Perez, if you ever make it back to the MLB, RUN. RUN TIMO RUN.
  • Roger Clemens throws half a bat at Mike Piazza in a steroid rage, no disciplinary action??

I don't think I will add any more sports grudges.I still want my teams to win, but I have so many more important things going on I really don't get upset anymore if they lose. The Devils had a 3-2 lead with 1:20 left in game 7 of the 1/4 finals. They gave up 2 goals and lost 4-3 and were eliminated from the playoffs. In years past, I would be on suicide watch, but instead I was writing blog posts about the Bathroom Incident and trying to hear Baby C with a cup and toilet paper roll. It just doesn't get to me anymore.


I've gone from a die-hard fan to a ho-hum fan. I think the reason I'm OK with that has a lot to do with the players. Players are now on Facebook and Twitter and we get an insight to what they go through before and after games. The night before the Buffalo game Mark Sanchez tweets "Wat movie should I watch in the hotel? Hangover, angels and demons, terminator, funny ppl, public enemies, star trek???" The next day he throws 5 interceptions and the Jets lose in OT. Maybe what movie to watch should not have been his top priority.

In the week leading up the the Jets vs Jags game, Dustin Keller and David Clowney were Tweeting about playing Connect 4. After the loss, David Clowny tweets about going to Times Square with his father. Maybe instead of playing games, you should throw the ball around. Work with Braylon Edwards on his drops. Somehow show that you are upset about the loss. Players should take the loss worst than their fans.

I goof off at my job from time to time and players should be given the same leniency, but I don't do my job in front of 78 thousand people, with millions more watching from home. If they aren't preparing for a game or upset about a loss, why should I be? You go play connect 4, watch your movies and hang out in the city after you have probably been eliminated from the playoffs in November. I'll hang out with my boy & wife.

The most telling sign in my change from die-hard sports fan to ho-hum sports fan is this: I cheered for the Yankees in the World Series. I am a changed man. Before we found out Allison was pregnant, I would never, NEVER cheer for the Yankees to win the World Series. Now, good for them. I don't even care if my son becomes a Yankees fan anymore. At least he'll have something to cheer about in 10 years when they are spending 400 million on salary and winning while the Mets spend 350 million and finish with 90 losses. I almost want him to pick different teams. While it's true cheering for a losing team builds character, I want him to enjoy winning. Thank God for the 1986 Mets, and the 1995, 2000 & 2003 Devils. Without them I'd have nothing to cheer for.
To the Jets, Mets, Devils and Magic, if you are reading this...do it for Ben! Thanks.

Friday, November 13, 2009

My First Night Alone with Benjamin

Tonight Allison met up with a few former coworkers in Winter Park for Happy Hour. She didn't go to drink, she just went to have a night out. Which means, I had a night in. Just me, Molly and Benjamin.

Now, I've been alone with Benjamin before. Allison got her nails done one weekend and went to the supermarket another time leaving me home both times for about an hour. Well tonight it was going to be longer than an hour. If I called her in a panic, it would take her close to an hour just to get home (maybe longer fighting Magic traffic), but I was ready for the challenge. Here we go:

Allison left just before 5. Ben should have been waking up any minute for a snack. I went in to check on him and found that his diaper leaked and there was poop all over his back and the crib sheets. Just how I wanted to start the evening. Oh well, It's just a little poop. Been there done that. I cleaned him up, put him in a new outfit and got to the feeding.

I warmed up the breast milk by running it under some hot water and splashed it on my hand to gauge the temp. Since it was on my hand and it was gonna go to waste, I decided I may as well taste it. Huh...that's very sweet. It's like milk with 10 sugar packets in it. Could that be right? Taste #2. Same. Not good, but I can see why Ben likes it. 1) it's all he knows. 2) kids like sugar and sweet things.

Feeding went well. Burps went well. Now we hang out until bath time and I change his dirty poop covered sheets. After some quality time, I put him in the bouncer and went upstairs. I saw Ben's eyes follow me to the stairs, then he started to cry, so I came back down. Two more times, 2 more cries. The third time he didn't cry, so I ran up to change the sheets. It took 4 more trips up and down before I got the sheets changed and got his crib bed ready. When I told Allison the story, she said "why didn't you just bring him upstairs in the bouncer?" I said "man! that's a much better idea!"

Bath time was a piece of cake. It wasn't my first time. Play, wash, rinse, dry, lotion, pajamas. Now off to his last feeding then bed. Feeding went well, but he did not want to be burped. I tried after each ounce, but he would just cry again until I fed him. After he finished his bottle, he burped twice and I thought I'd put him down and walk away like Mommy does.

Well I thought wrong. He screamed bloody murder for 20-30 minutes. Finally he took his pacifier and went to sleep. He is still sleeping now. I got this dad stuff down! Having said that, I don't want Allison make this going out stuff a regular thing, she's much better at it than I am.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

It's Funny Being a Dad

Like the title says, it's funny being a dad. I've only just begun and I'm looking forward to a lot more funny moments, but here are a few that have happened in the first 8 weeks. I'm sure they are funnier if you were there, but I'll try to do them justice.

Let's start with today. How about a poll of the audience, by a show of hands did the following happen to you today?
  • Did you get pooped on?
  • Did you get peed on?
Nobody? Wow, 2 for 2. This was a pretty good day. One more question.
  • Did you have a baby puke on you today? Puke so bad that you had to change your shirt and also, some of it went into your mouth? If so, just go ahead and raise your hand.
Well, 2 out of 3 ain't bad. It wasn't me, Allison was the lucky one. She was carrying Ben down the stairs when he unloaded on her. From what she told me it went all over her shirt and a little bit went into her mouth. She laughed about it which is good because I laughed really hard when she told me the story.

I don't want it to happen to me, but he isn't on solid food yet, so there couldn't have been any chunks. And, since she willingly eats and enjoys cottage cheese, it wasn't even the most disgusting thing she had in her mouth today. Still sucks though, sorry honey.

A few weeks ago there was a partial reenactment of 3 Men and a Baby. Do you remember the scene where Tom Selleck's character is reading about a boxing match from Sports Illustrated to the baby and when questioned about it he says something like "it doesn't matter what I say as long as I use this silly sing-song voice"? Well I had a conversation with Allison doing that.

I was reading Goodnight Moon to Ben and it was not putting him to sleep. I read it 3 times and he was still fussing and crying. Allison was standing at the door and in my best Tom Selleck I said "Can you give me another book, this one isn't working. What do you mean read it again? Give me the Grover book. He isn't feeling it tonight, just give me the damn Grover book. You're being a jerk face. Help or get out. WAIT! I thought you would pick help...you can stay. What's that Ben? He told me he wants you to hold him...and he wants me to eat candy. No? I thought that would work."

The last thing I have for you tonight is the endless stream of That's What She Said jokes, that started in the delivery room. No joke, I think Allison was in mid push and busted out a That's What She Said. The doctor and nurse must have thought we were crazy, but I was so proud. I wish I could remember what it was about, but I can't.

There are so many, we can't do them all (that's what she said) but we can't. We've already done too many to keep track of them all(that's what she said) Here are a few I remember:
  • At doctor's office He's getting so big (that's what she said)
  • Newborn clothes: He doesn't fit in this anymore (that's what she said)
  • Bouncer: He used to be so tiny in there, now he fills up almost the whole thing (that's what she said)
  • Diaper bag: Where should I stick it? In the front or in the back?(that's what she said)
  • Formula/milk: Put it on your finger in to see if it's hot. (that's what she said)
  • Bath time: I made a mess. Just keep going and clean it up later. (that's what she said)
  • Diaper Genie: It's really packed in there. You can't get any more in there (that's what she said)

Monday, November 9, 2009

Super Sunday

Yesterday was a good day. A super day you could say. It started early, Molly woke me up to go potty at 5:30. 5:30 on my day off. Thanks Molly. I guess that is payback for forgetting to feed her until 9:30PM the other night. Now we're even.

Next I went to my running group. Our running coach Sara, who based on her running times I think is a fembot, was away in Vegas so we were on our own. We decided take advantage and run at 7AM instead of 6. We were supposed to run for 75 minutes. I only did 73 minutes. But that's a good thing, it means I was 2 minutes faster on the way back. I did 6 miles. It was great. I was very proud of myself, Kim and Patti (my running buddies)

When I got home Benjamin was just waking up. Allison and I watched him in his crib for a while. We made him smile a lot. I turned on the mobile, he stared at it and smiled. He followed the monkey, the parrot and the monkey all around. I said "Screw football, I can watch this all day" I only said it because the Jets had a bye, but still, it was really fun to watch. I wonder if it was someone elses kid if it would be as awesome?
I also had some time to read Benjamin a book. I haven't read him anything in a while, so he got 2 books. Up first, my favorite book as a kid, The Monster at the end of this Book. It may not have been the best book to read him to get him to fall asleep, but I really enjoyed it.
The second book was Corduroy. I had never read it before. Actually I had never even heard of it before. It's a good book. I won't tell you what happens, but it's about a bear named Corduroy who lives in a toy store.


That's all I have for now. It was a fun day until I got tired. 6 miles makes me tired and really cranky.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Week 7 for Ben, What a week it was!

Ben turned 7 weeks old this week. He's getting so big and his cheeks have puffed out a little bit. He's looking cuter than ever.
This week had a crazy end to it. There was a shooting in an office building in Downtown Orlando. Allison and I used to work together downtown. I since have left and found another job, Allison was laid off and is currently unemployed. If anyone wants to hire her with a starting 6 figure salary, please leave a comment below. Anyway, being laid off is never a good thing, but I was glad she was safe at home and not locked down in her 16 story downtown office building. Next week Tropical Storm Ida is expected to hit Florida. Stay tuned for news on that one.

I noticed a difference in life before Ben this week, maybe even before marriage and life now. If you know me, you know about my hair. I used to use lots of gel. I styled my hair and it didn't move. I got it cut every 2 weeks and I made sure it looked good. Now if I got my hair cut every 2 weeks I'd ask if Allison heard bad news from the doctor and this was her way of breaking it to me. Ben is 7 weeks old and I've had 1 haircut since he's been born. I look ridiculous. I've been using Jim's dad from the movie"American Pie" as a comparison. "Don't forget your penis cream son"
In a simpler time before Ben and before Allison I would never NEVER be seen looking like this. I would call in sick to work or wear a hat if the job at the time would allow it. But now, oh well. I go to work, I go running, I take Ben places and I look like a schlemiel. It just doesn't matter what I look like anymore. I have nobody to impress and until Oprah calls for me big interview, I don't see it changing anytime soon.

Speaking of taking Ben places, this morning we took him to Downtown Disney. First we met up with a longtime friend and his family for breakfast, then we went to Downtown Disney to look for Ben's first Christmas ornament. There is a store there that sells and customizes Christmas stuff year round. We did a few laps around the store and selected his ornament and stocking. Want to see them? Sorry, you have to wait until Christmas, well at least until the weekend after Thanksgiving when we decorate the house. You can trust me when I say they are awesome.
I tried to take pix of Benjamin with some Mickey Mouse and other character merchandise, but he was not cooperating. Mommy wasn't a big help with the photography today either, but still it was a good day. I think it's a preview of his first couple of Santa Claus and Easter Bunny pix. We did get a few good shots with the soldiers outside to make up for it.
Just like every other kid that goes to Disney, Benjamin came home and passed out. Get used to this kid, lots more of this in your future.




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